The College of Psionic Meditation
(In which people with really focused minds stare at walls and like it. Dean of Psionic Meditation: Neeva of Athas)
ARDENT
The Program: Choose the paths that work for you. Devote yourself to Light and Darkness, as well as Freedom, then next level choose Evil. Or the Elements. It's great fun. No pesky deities to limit your choices. Why not Good and Evil? It's all good.
"My ass, it's all good. My selection of powers is restricted entirely to my mantles? Jozan's spells aren't restricted to his domains! Where' the justice, where's the justice, I ask you?" --Melmen, 1st year human ardent
"Mmm-hmm, mm-hmm. So, like, Time Mantle, you say? Um, could you give me, like, last Thursday back?" --Mialee, 5th year elf wizard
"So, with the ability to draw power from universal concepts themselves, I really see no reason for the gods... Ack!" --Chivaron, 3rd year human ardent, taking Chaotic Good philosophies from Donar Wotanson, cleric of Thor
DIVINE MIND
The Program: Psionicists devoted to deities. Sounds crazy? Well, it's not! It most certainly is not! Sure, clerics get spells right off the bat, and Divine Minds don't get powers until, well, generally mid-Sophomore year. And sure Clerics can choose two domains right off the bat. And Divine Minds only get one... until later... but, hey! We eventually offer three! And they're every bit as good as cleric domains! They are!
"I devote myself to Zuoken, God of Mental Perfection" --Dodd, 2nd year half-giant Divine Mind
"Yeah, me too. Most of us do. He's the only deity specifically geared for Psionicists." --Josie, 2nd year human Divine Mind
"Oh, guess what. We can't turn undead, either" --Chavv, 2nd year formerly human, now vampire spawn, Divine Mind
ERUDITE
The Program: Although technically a psion with a specific academic focus, the Erudite differs just enough to stick him in the back of the course catalog. By creating a repertoire, you can effectively learn any and all Psion powers, but you can only use a few each day. Sort of like the Wizard, but without a cat or raven to talk to. You could talk to your psicrystal, but they've got pretty narrow personalities. It's a lonely major, it really is...
"That wasn't a very positive description. How do you expect students to sign up with a description that insults the course?" --Professor Bartles Mindseye, human erudite professor
"Haha. You got wizard in my psion." --Krusk, 4th year half-orc barbarian. "Hehe. You got psion in my wizard." --Regdar, 5th year human fighter. "I'm not your wizard, and where I put the psion is my business." --Mialee, 5th year elf wizard
"No... no... I wanted to learn a power from a discipline, not the power of discipline." --Tiddrick, 1st year human erudite, to Vicola, 4th year cleric of Loviatar
LURK
The Program: Sneaky and manipulative. Dangerous when you don't see them, and evasive when you do. The Lurk program combines the best features of the Rogue, with vast (well, moderate) psionic power. Plus, we just tend to better smarter than rogues.
"'Plus we just tend to be smarter than rogues' Yeah, how many skills do you have, Nesstine?" --Kerwyn, 3rd year human rogue
"Little known fact, but one of the Lurk's other special abilities, is to hang around message boards without actually posting." --Gimble, 2nd year gnome geek
"Screw you, Kerwyn. I can sneak attack undead. Can you sneak attack undead? Can you?" --Nesstine, 2nd year elan lurk, and eventual Kerwyn bedmate (you know these types of arguments always lead there)
PSION
The Program: The Psion program is the
cornerstone of Sigil’s College of Psionic Meditation. We pride ourselves on the
care and devotion we give to each student’s mind, and can guarantee that this
year there are no subversive plans to groom their empowered brains for illithid
feeding. With exceptional sub-programs in all disciplines, many Psions are
graduated each year. Each student is responsible for his or her own psicrystal.
“It is odd to me that the intense training of psionic gifts results in the hair
loss of many students. It never seems to affect the women” –Ialdabode, 2nd
year human telepath
“See, every year the Psi Omega sorority goes around to the boy’s dorms and
shaves their heads. It’s like a ritual.” –Mitra, 4th year human shaper
“So, like, it’s pretty much just staring at the wall for eight hours a day,
right? At least monks get to throw punches and stuff” –Mialee, 5th year elf
wizard
PSYCHIC WARRIOR
The Program: A more physically intensive
psionics program, the Psychic Warrior is perfect for jocks and others who wish
to mix their psychic gifts with a more corporeal regimen. This program offers a
number of electives, though a meditation lab is required.
“I think the best part of being a psychic warrior over a psion, is I don’t have
to carry a rock around” –Sandharrow, 1st year half-giant psychic warrior
“It’s a good foundation for expanded learning. I’ve been trying to transfer to
an Illithid Slayer prestige program. I meet all the qualifications, but my
advisor, Mr. I’gn’tharia won’t sign my papers.” –Ragnara, 4th year maenad
psychic warrior
“Try? There is no try. This a pass or fail class is. If fail you do, next
semester come back you must.” –Mr. Dah, blue goblin psychics theory professor
SOULKNIFE
The Program: Though it falls under the College
of Psionic Meditation, this program does not offer traditional psionic
manifestation. Rather, it is a specifically geared program dedicated toward
channeling your psionic potential into forging psychic weaponry. The most
physically intensive of all the psionic majors, Soulknife students generally go
on to important careers after graduation.
“We hire fifteen soulknives a year on average, mostly from Sigil Prep’s
graduating class. We’re looking for motivated individuals who don’t ask
questions” –the Night Masks, major Faerun employer
“A few years ago, there was a series of murders on campus, vicious slashings,
and no murder weapon was found. Every Soulknife major was held under house
arrest and interrogated. Those guys are scary, let me tell you. So okay, it
turned out to be somebody’s imp familiar with a pair of scissors. Still, it
could have been a soulknife.” –Regdar, never one to let misinformation spoil
a good story
“People tend to want to glamorize the violence of this program. In truth, it’s a
very insightful, exciting path to self-discovery and... Wait, I’m not done with
my quote yet!” –Xerxes, 3rd year Xeph soulknife
WILDER
The Program: While Wilders are certainly the
result of natural ability, much like artists, actors, and sorcerers, it is that
spark of natural talent that we fan into the flame of true greatness. It is
emotion that fuels your powers, and we teach you to unleash your emotions in
ways that you haven’t envisioned yet. All students must sign a waiver to enter
this program.
“They’re nuts. All of them, just nuts” –Mitra, 4th year human psion
“Shut up or I’ll shove that astral construct of yours down your sissy-girl
throat.” –Eulad, 4th year human wilder
“So, like, what’s this about surging euphoria?” –Vadania, 4th year elf druid